Yes, Lindsey, and everyone else who was thinking the same thing. I can't very well be calling myself "the gringa" in Calgary. I have been wrestling with the name change thing over the past couple of days, reading a ton of T.S. Eliot trying to find some cool line from a poem that I could steal and make myself seem oh-so-profound. But alas, as much as I really do love Eliot, all the lines that I was drawn to were a bit despairing (my favorite speaking of measuring out one's life in coffee spoons. Why do I love that line so much - I love it more than coffee.)
Anyway, the dilemma has been that I am not done with Peru, nor do I want to be "done" with Peru. I will have more to say about her before we go and then more after we have been gone and I am missing her quirky ways. I have great friends here. My kids have great friends here. I have learned to appreciate adventure and to almost welcome unpredictability - well, maybe not welcome it, but to be ok with it - to look it in the eye and not be afraid of it. Peru has been heart and soul shaping and I don't want to forget even a little bit of the effect this experience has had on my life, my faith, my heart.
So I didn't want to create a title that would negate the reality of where I am still, while looking ahead to what will come next and wanting to be engaged with both - both worlds.
And thus, the epiphany (although not the most clever I am sure and please don't let me know how many other bloggers out there have this title - ignorance is bliss). I like this title because it goes with me wherever I go -wherever God takes me - with whomever he takes with me to be in the midst of whomever he chooses to surround me. I also like it because I struggle with the "world between the worlds" in which we live. The already and the not yet. The what has been and what will also be.
I find myself teetering "from one world to another" in my spiritual life as I long to know God as all I'll ever need and then find myself coveting that beautiful thing I saw at my friends house - that thing I don't have. I find myself longing for Heaven to be free from hurt, and then wishing my kids would stay exactly as they are right now. I want it and I don't.
So, there you go. New title. Same blah blah blahing.
Same me. That's all I got today.
5 comments:
Sometimes it is scary to go where God sends you to make your home among strangers and do His work. I see how you have been tested and how you have grown in your two years in Peru and I am ever amazed at the woman, mother, helpmate, servant and missionary you have become. It wasn't always easy, but you have overcome your doubts, fears, the Peruvian carnet system, the bus to Lima, and countless hair-raising taxi rides. You are stronger than you thought, and I admire your willingness to set off again for whatever God has in store for you.
Much love,
Mom F
Love it!
d'un monde à l'autre.
that's "From one world to another" in French. :-)
I'm just sayin'!
I love it Heather. And I can't tell you how much I already miss you. Shawn is framing the basement this very moment... we are thinking of you all daily. Yesterday he said, "I want to talk to them all the time." Can't wait until that is reality.
We love you all so dearly.
Oh wow! I just checked your blog and saw the BIG NEWS!!! So excited that you guys are going to be "back home" for a while. It will be so great to see you and John and those beautiful children of yours on Sundays!
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